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Gordons plan to beat the recession.

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Gordons plan to beat the recession.

Post  tard on Tue Aug 25, 2009 6:45 pm

I recd this letter just now WOW the government has plans for you now!

FROM THE PRIME MINISTER
10 Downing Street
London, SW1
June 2009

Dear People of the United Kingdom

Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown of the economy, your Government has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50 years of age and older on early retirement. This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).
Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to the Government to be selected to be eligible for the SHAFT Scheme (Special Help After Forced Termination).

Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW programme (Scheme Covering Retired Early Workers). A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice, and SCREWED as many times as the Government deems appropriate.
Only persons who have been RAPED can get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependents and Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance). Obviously, persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by the Government.

Persons who are RAPED and are staying on, will receive as much SHIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. The Governemt has always prided itself in the amount of SHIT it gives out. Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring this to the attention of your local Member of Parliament. They have been trained to give you all the SHIT you can handle.

Sincerely,
GORDON BROWN
Prime Minister.

tard

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Location : Blidworth Mansfield
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