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Computer Tech Support

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Computer Tech Support

Post  Martin & Nettie on Fri Oct 03, 2008 8:01 pm

Computer Tech Support
This ought to make you feel better about your computer skills!



=================================
Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?

Female customer: A white one...

===============


Customer: Hi, this is Celine . I can't get my diskette out.
Tech support: Have you tried pushing the Button?
Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
Tech support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note.
Customer: No , wait a minute.. I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... sorry....


===============


Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the
screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?


===============


Tech support: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello... I can't print.
Tech support: Would you click on 'start' for me and...
Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill
Gates.


===============


Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time
I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and
placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't
find it...


============== =


Customer: I have problems printing in red..
Tech support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.


===============

Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.


===============


Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer:! OK
Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there
another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah..that one does work...


===============


Tech support: Your password is the small letter 'a' as in apple, a
capital letter V as n Victor, the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters ?


== =============


Customer: can't get on the Internet.
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.


===============


Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.


===============


Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on
my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.


===============


Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get
the circle around it?


===============


A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her
printer.
Tech support: Are you running it under windows?
Customer: 'No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point.
The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his
printer is working fine.'


===============


And last but not least...

Tech support: 'Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at
the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen.
Now type the letter 'P' to bring up the Program Manager.'
Customer: I don't have a P.
Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean?
Tech support: 'P'.....on your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT
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Martin & Nettie

Number of posts : 1216
Location : Runcorn
Job/hobbies : Former SOC President and Secretary - its up to Mr Wezgit & Nettie now
Registration date : 2008-06-25

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Re: Computer Tech Support

Post  tard on Sat Oct 04, 2008 9:30 am

I used to think people made these up. My bro now works in a tech help call centre, these idiots exsist, and are often earning a LOT of money!!!

My computer won't work. is it plugged in? I can't tell there is a power cut!!!!

tard

Number of posts : 101
Age : 34
Location : Blidworth Mansfield
Job/hobbies : vehicles in general
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